Reasons to blog

From 6 years ago - you wanna know why to keep blogging ? People like this -


If not know that your gentle comments are very much apprecated as little kisses blown by the soft winds .
When I was 22, I went to Hawaï with the man I was going to love all my life long and who passed away 7 years ago . We came from Los Angeles where we were travelling and had very little money . It was fast spend in Honolulu and then we had to play Robinson Crusoë in Kauaï . Michel everynight would built a hut with 4 sticks, some palms tree branches and our beach towels and of course being in our 20's and in love we had a ball !!!! In fact it was in Kauaï airport that he asked ( I should say begged!) me to marry him . I do not think I was exactly his type but he said the magic of that week was forever in his cells and he was going to spend his life with the magician , and he did, so your beautiful part of the world is precious to me for ever and ever. I would have loved to come back and put my older feet in our young steps but can't go everywhere . Maybe you are not even hawaian but to me you are Mark from Hawaï and that is why I wanted to share this precious memories with you to say thank you and send love and light your way ...

Pause

There are a great many things that give pause. I cant imagine the pain that people go thru daily; I cant stand the way life has been treating us lately. It isnt overwhelming; its just hard. I cant seem to come to grips with the little guys death; nor can I get on track with the surrounding circumstances of that loss. There is great joys with the grandkids; Kaleo + Kekoa + Kiana are blossoming all around us, and yet I am distracted in grief. What the hell? The guys all on their own pitched in to help at a baby luau we were at; helping to load chairs and put away table and clean up the area. I was so proud of them. They did it all on their own, no asking no prodding, just started in to help. That made me smile. Not a day goes by where the queen and I dont have some kind of conflict; some kind of issue where anger plays a big role, where love is absent. That really is starting to suck; and drains my soul daily. I dread some days; I try to focus and yet everything is so blurred. I guess it will pass, but I wonder wistfuly at was has become of our lives? Longing for happiness, overcome by reality, and trying to remain normal. Some things are just impossible.