Peace on Earth good will & all that jazz

Sinfest Sunday

Rap me out a tune for 2009.


Who turned off the lights?

Hey, I PAID my damn electric bill. You coulda powered the entire island with the power that is consumed by the crew that reside in my hale (ha-lay, thats home) ... Maybe all the islands. Any who, cooking rice in the old style way this morning after working in the dark at the hotel. At least it was after Christmas, before Kwanzaa, and around Hanuka or Chanuka or Festivus or whatever you wanna celebrate or not, and visit homes with a "Awake" pamphlet and long dresses and suits on 90 degree afternoons....I digress; sorry Jehovahs.

Photo from Rob Rock

I guess this flash is what caused all the power faults. At least it was pretty?

Photo T. Reis

So the visitors to aloha-land had a unexpected faux-pas to the excursion into paradissimo. You'd be surprised (no, you wouldnt) at the shitski they try to pull. I didnt realize that the acts of God were my fault; apparently they are. But WTF, its OK.

And U thought MY driving is bad?

The mo'opunas got an electric 4 wheel drive terroist vehicle for which to destroy the neighborhood. (my neighbors are gonna love me EVEN more) Somehow, the son 1 or 2 figured out how to jack the speed on the damn thing so if you WANT to follow them, you have to run.

I tell you, he doesnt KNOW!

Kaleo and nephew Asa, at the helm, waiting for freedom and pedestrians.

And HECO (hawaiian electric) a big Pfffffffft! since this happens way toooooo often, and last time I checked we werent a 3rd world country.

Shit, I may be wrong about that.


?wheres my damn lighter?

* Obama hung out at the beach the other day, ate at the shopping center I have Kona Brews at, and in general I am DAMN proud.

Ok, Pau.


Mele Kalikimaka

Merry Christmas all.

Take care, hope you all caught a good time w/ loved ones......






When you get in the habit of never saying no, there in a myriad of spinning webs and dust bunnies lying under the well meaning act of saying yes.

Yeah thats a WTF, if there ever was, and ebver will be one.


You can gain a lot from watching people; you can also get yourself in a mess of trouble if when you are in a really piss-poor mood, and somebody stares and comments at you the wrong way. Then you can kick yourself in the ass for all the days that passed where you didnt get pissed, and you didnt lose your temper, and you didnt freak the fuck out, and you didnt get that big old piece of wood and break the fuck outta it. Of course, you dont get credit for time served in this business; no sir, you get no due. Nope. Just lose your wicket for one fucking moment. And all bets are off.

Oh well. You can still gain alot from watching people. The way they act, the way they move in space, the countenance they orchestrate.

So watch and see.



Kaleo James



Kaleo James @ 2

Took Kaleo to visit my mother in law at the care home w/ the wife. He was playing with the bed and snapped this soooo busted pix of him.

They get big really, really fast,

Deep fried 6 turkeys yesterday; then worked at the Moana's Beach Bar for holiday pay for 8 long hours.

Most of the patrons were pretty cool.

Most got pretty buzzed.

Shoots, Aloha

Hope all had a good 1.



You were so cool.

We'd sit and eat veggies and mayonaise, with shoyu.

You drove that SS Chevelle too fast, and tended gardens so slowly.

6 pearls and 1 stone, and what a diamond you were to me.

I didnt know you spoke fluent Hawaiian for too long; what stories Tutu Lily must have told you.

Riding horseback from Kaupo to the big city(!); gathering goods thrown from the barge.

Smoking that sweet smelling tobacco, I loved playing with your ultra-hip lighter.

Seeing you everyday when running off the field, and yelling "Herb" intead of Herb.

Forgetting your hearing aid and swimming; you drove Grandma nuts.

I'll always love you.

Me Ke Aloha Pumehana, my Tutu Kane.



There tends to be times when things are as difficult as can be. You know how when things come in threes? Or when that one fricking spot don’t come out as in some stain? Or perhaps it is the interpretation of what you said that isn’t comprehended by the other that you are speaking to?


Yeah that’s what I mean.

You know there are days that come in droves; those days when the influx of crap is undeniably un-defendable. There is no way you will defeat the crap attack. There is no way the defender of the goal will keep the offending offense from scoring at will; cause “It aint gonna happen, Jules.”

Yeah that’s the ticket; you can just sense the downward spiral of intoxicating fluids coursing through your veins, adept at avoiding the sanity indicators. Every stop light you come to is red. Fucking 8 minimum grocery line has the new cashier, the one with 3 fingers and smells.

Fucking karma.

Oh but it isn’t karma, dude. It is not, cause you be living right, eh?

No it aint. It is just the fucking way shit happens. Shit happens. People fucking die. And your loans don’t get approved, and fucking shit happens, man.

You get responsibility placed at your dining room table; and you ache at the chance to prove to yourself; ANYONE, that fucking shit don’t happen this way. That by doing right, by trying, by giving it that good old fucking college try; that shit wont happen that way.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It jives to the left, you jump to the right, and you man the fuck up. Well, yeah maybe.

Quit the fucking whining, and see the fact of the matter as you are fucking lucky, you are fucking blessed, you are fucking breathing, living, loving, existing in this “Lipstick on pit bull” fucking world.

(What the fuck is with that? They garrans ballbearings don’t have a fucking Pit Bull)

Quit the fucking crying ass shit.

Because I was in charge today.

Yeah and it was OT.
And during that OT we had building fire, a overturned Kayak, a HAZMAT incident, a inaccessible brush fire, and assorted dramas. Before it was 12:30 in the afternoon; when I was to get off.

We also had the 911 call from a firefighters wife that he had hung himself in the bathroom; listened to her cries and pleas for help and assistance; her begging for the neighbor to help cut him down, and his heartless “I have a bad back”. We had to notify the chiefs, and assorted critical incident stress de-briefers. He coded; and died.

And now I am at the fucking Hotel; listening to the bitching of people over 13 dollar burgers.


Hug someone.


Hay is for horses, grass is for cows.


For all that it is worth; (which in these gosh darn, funnin' econonic times) ainta tad much over zip, for the life of meself cant rescue my ass from a hole in the ground.


Like I know.

Grandkiddo Kaleo walked in the bedroom the other morning ( which, since it has been muggy as hell) had the AC on (thereby depleting the ozone layer, my bank account and the federal reserve all in one fell swoop) and stated -

"It is cold in here"

Of course not being one to argue with a 2 year old who is obviously smarter than I, I immediately realized the ironic statement he had made.

Smart kid, that 1.

Economix conflagurations notwithstanding, the tourist industry in aloha - land has been damned to eternal hell by the Jerry Falwell of the tourist trade - high friggin' air fares

But - The Moana is head above the rest in being that the clientle are coming in droves from Europe, Aussie land and points where the $ VS. (whatever the damn currency that aint dinars) is.


The Pink hell re-opens in all its grandiose on January 20, 2009.

I'll be turning fifty.

I have not surfed in many days.

Thats it.

Aloha, stay warm.

Stay well.



Damn it.

Thats what I thought.

Damn it to Nth degree.

You know your in that void when the lemonade that yo made from the lemons that were given are not only way tooooo sour; but putrid as well.

But I did fart around with Kaleo & Kekoa, and Mai was picked up from school.

And the freaking sun will prolly come up tomorrow.

Albeit 777 points lighter.



Hi, I'm Mark and I am a Doofus.

You know what? What? I am a doofus.

No shit sherlock! It aint like the powers that be never notice! Hey! Being trampled afoot by those who you aloha is to be expwcted, no?

Douche bag, you put a 'w' where a 'e' was supposed to go, moron.


Ahhh the battles in my head; there is someone in there; but its not me.

(plagirism courtesy Pink Floyd, thank you very much)

I could shine on like a crazy diamond, but not right now. I busy.

The old doofi has been working as much as he can at the jobs 1 & 2, but the damn biotch of the situation is that shit is not cutting it, thanks GWB, oil companies, the moon, the fucking wind and anyone else that i really care to freaking blame.

Now me has gots to go and work a whole friggin bunch more hours at the NEW PINK - (the Moana) - good staff; not me who is bitching; god bless drunken bar patrons)

But WTF - (using all that goddamn cool text abbrev, donycha know) I will FKNG survive.


Ther eaint no swells on the horizon, BTW.

(oooooooOOOOooOooOoOoooo, more cool text abbrev!)

Grant me a pass, friends, Aloha to you all.

Me just vent, me just vent.


Mahalo, Edgar.

I have surfed for over 35 years. Never had any pictures of said act of better than sex addiction of mine.
Thanks, Edgar for something that means a lot to me, that my own family doesnt get......


Its Surf Time

Went for a surf; I am 20 shades of bummed, and not really too clear, but hey its all good.
Shit; Thats better.


Full Moon; Surf

Had the full moon fever the other night at Fire; every manic and there speed freak friends were out and about causin havoc.

Its all good tho' Surfy yessterday and surf today.

10 shades of burnt.


What's that noise?

Oh shit, that'd be me coming out of hibernation, and the relative void that is work and home and life and stress and surf and ever eclipsing vortexi of shit like that!

Is vortexi a word? Hell if i know, but it sounds right.

Speaking of sounding right, or left for that matter, WTF is w/ Cokie Roberts? (I mean first of you got the worst nasal drug themed nickname right off the bat) It conjurs up visions of some bad Flock Of Seagulls 80's coke-party video, but I'll digress.

She figured in some speech that Hawai'i is a foreign land - OK I'll give her the benefit of the doubt and assume she has no clue of the year 1959, and the statehood thingy, but the spin doctors tried to shuffle it off as "well, Hawai'i tries to promote itself as exotic and foreign"


I think not, said doofus boy.

And on the subject of being totally incoherent, Kekoa Kahananui (grandson #2 for those keeping a box score) - Had his 1st baby luau the other day which is a great deal of the reason for lotssssssssssssss of OT work at Fire, and 2nd job duties at the Moana.

Taro Brand Poi

The first thing on the B-day morning is getting up and getting to this place at the wonderful time of 630, and hour-and-a-half later than I shoulda. It's downtown near the docks and thats always and adventure. 35 pounds of the wonderous sticky goodness that is Poi.

Dee-Lite Bakery

Then it's off to the Dee-Lite bakery, to pick up the chunk-a-lunka's B-Day cake. I love the name Dee-Lite Bakery. It reminds me of the old time names of buisness like "Dew-Drop Inn" or "Clem's Motorcycle repair and Coffee Emporium" - Maybe not so much on the second one, you know my humour, it's a tad off kilter.

The one that actually stayed readable

Of course with all the running around picking up shi...shtuff and such, I apparently braked too hard some where along the line and the 2nd cake inscription turned into instead of Happy - B-Day Roo (his nickname) it looked something like the translation of War & Peace into Chinese.

Oh well.

No that sand was there already , dear

I didnt stop for a surf check.

I didnt

OK, maybe just a peek.

Just a small kine skoshi look.

OK, damn thats why I was late to the Poi

Of course there is al kines of food, family and friends.

Then you got some killer views from Cathy's cousins ranch in Waimanalo, on the Winward side of the island.

From the Luau area

Rabbit Island (Manana)

Momhawaiianmark came over from the big island and stayed with us for a day before jet-setting back to the quiet that is Honoka'a on the Big Isle.

On a innaressing note, I found what I think is 16mm film of my parents wedding from 1957, I sent it to get it changed into DVD and in 3 weeks it should be wild to find out. Not to mention if it is; the sights of Honolulu in '57 versus now should be amazing, not to mention in plain english.

I plan on blowing my parents mind with it.

He crashed on the way there.

...and was a terror the whole dang party; eating everything (raw fish, soy beans, poi, tako poke, lomi lomi salmon, and everything else)

I did some chasing of Kaleo, I did.

But it's all good, I needed the exercise. Yeah, riiiiiiiiight.

Play with your food, its healthy

Kowboy Kekoa

And thats a wrap.

Take care and thanks for the good thoughts.

Aloha as always.



Been having long days and longer nights.

The thing is, the world has all these damn obstacles to happiness. And surfing; the water; it is a greater thing than god imagined. He doesnt get the credit I deserve to give him for all that it does for me.

My mind is racing so fast now, and the dreams that are invading my sleeping hours are haunt filled and really frikkin weird.

Basically, I am scared.

Then I see these bright blue eyes of KJ, and the damn shit dont seem so bad.

But it really, really, it is.

I'm going surfing tomorrow.


Blessed church of the open sky will be my apse.

and water will be my communion.

See ya.



Another tale of surf.

From the sea to the mountains, I am lucky.


Please Forgive Me...

The surf has been really good. I am 10 shades of burnt.

Damn, its been sweet.